We could all use a good sensei in our lives. Where would Ralph Macchio be without Mr. Miyagi in 'The Karate Kid'? Where would Uma Thurman be without Pai Mei in 'Kill Bill'? And frankly, where would any of us be without Mr. Philip H. Anselmo? We've learned much from Anselmo, but comedian Dave Hill learned the hard way in episode two of 'Metal Grasshopper.'

As one of metal's most colorful and prolific musicians, Anselmo can pretty much put anything to tape and come out successful, whether in the studio or during a film shoot. The dude even voiced his own character on episode four of 'Cooking Hostile.' Dave Hill doesn't quite possess those skills yet, which is why he asked the Pantera / Down legend to be his metal mentor.

Rule One: Always be ready for an attack. Hill didn't sleep with one eye open, and thus, received a dick punch wake-up from Anselmo. In the swamps of New Orleans, Dave Hill learns of the power within 'Boo Berry' and 'Franken Berry' cereal, the importance of smoking cigarettes, how to headbang properly and the proper way to apologize through a King Diamond falsetto.

Check out the hysterical second episode of 'Metal Grasshopper' above!

Watch Philip Anselmo Play ‘Wikipedia: Fact or Fiction?’

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