Tearful Hayley Williams on Depression: ‘My Dog Is the Reason I’m Alive’
One listen to Hayley Williams' recent solo music and there's a definite feel of something more personal going on for the singer. The vocalist recently chatted with Beats 1 host Zane Lowe about her Petals for Armor record, and in particular the depression and personal feelings that drove the music and made it something that fit more as a solo release than a Paramore record.
"When I think about putting this out as a Paramore album, it doesn't do justice to the stories themselves and it doesn't do justice to the band," states Williams.
The singer explains during the very revealing conversation that she was dealing with childhood issues and traumas, and how she's been afraid of losing people in her life, and in the midst of working on music, her grandmother suffered a fall that left her with a traumatic brain injury.
Speaking on going through the darkest of depressions, Lowe asked Williams what keeps her moving forward. “My dog is the reason I’m alive, because he would’ve been waiting on me to get home, no matter what. You know how little sweet little puppies sit and they wait? I couldn’t think about it," says Williams before tearing up.
"I just couldn't, and I'm glad because life is still hard," she continued. “It didn’t become just like a breeze overnight or anything and it’s been years and it’s still not a breeze, but it’s so rich and now that I’m taking account of all these feelings and I’m feeling all of them, there’s this beautiful rainbow versus just the deep end.”
Williams credits visualization therapy for helping her understand the power of protecting oneself during her dark times. She also spoke of film and TV series that empower women - such as Peppermint, Handmaid's Tale and others - as being helpful as she attempted to work through her issues.
While the record isn't a Paramore record, Williams does have Taylor York producing the album. Williams has already issued the singles "Simmer" and "Leave It Alone." Look for the Petals for Armor record arriving on May 8.
Hayley Williams Discusses Depression + More With Beats 1's Zane Lowe